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Just...






I've not been in the best of moods as of the last day. And hearing these songs have not helped. Though, they have gotten the tears out which I guess could be a form of help.

/wave

I'm alive. Maybe. I'll explain more later. >.>

Rawr

So, I"m doing better. Normally don't write in this thing anymore. Don't really see the point, yet I have people that follow me hear that have NO IDEA what I'm going through lately. So let me just say the following:

April 8: I went to work, bu the pinched nerve in my back acted up. Went to the doctor, had x-rays ordered. Was told to stay off work.

Some days later X-rays showed nothing. Then ordered for a MRI. More MRIs!  Anyway, doctor calls me past her office hours to tell me that I have a bulging disk in my lower back. She then sends me to a Neurosurgeon. There I'm told that the disk makes me a good candidate for back surgery. Surgery... Again. AGAIN!

So here we are a month after. I was just informed that my date of surgery will be the 19th. Two weeks.

Over the weekend I went to a friend's house that I've been needing to see for two years. It was wonderful, gave me a chance to get away from here and not think about my back, even though it let me know it was thinking of me. I didn't care, I went to Niagara Falls, the Hard Rock there (because I have this NEED To go to Hard Rock Cafes if they are around.) Umm..... We went to a historic wax museum. That was rather funny.

Went t a buffalo farm. Aww they look so cute... from far away. And we kept it that way. Far Away. Then we went down to lake Erie. And then... then.... we bummed out for a day since I had to go home soon. Anyway, we had a good time. Trying to coax her into coming down here soon.

But.. that has been my month really. And yes, I had a birthday May 1. 25 years now. 25 years old and I'll soon have three majors surgeries under my belt. Yippy. Can i just.... have.. like a new body?
I'm only logging in after..... 5 months of nothing so simply say, fuck off.

People ONLY fucking build you up to fucking push you down the fucking stairs. That is it. Fuck Trust, fuck honesty, fuck compassion. Just fuck it all. It is pointless and so not worth it any more. Hate, pain, angry, that is the only thing I really care about right now.

Silence

I've been rather silent for the past few months. I moved from Baker to Louisville, in case you missed that.

I've been unemployed since June. Been looking but just have not found anything. Even had a few interviews, just never was offered anything.

Well, last week UPS asked me to come in for an interview. So I went and at the end, I was offered a job within one of their medical supplies warehouses. *squeals with joy*

Before getting this, I was freaking out in my head. Tried to be cool, clam and collected, but still freaking out. Now that I have this... Boy have I felt the weight lifted off my shoulders.

OK, well, I'm done for now.

New Chapter in my Life...


And I have to start it off with a faceplam/headdesk moment.

I'm moving to Kentucky in three weeks. So I do the good thing and take my car in to have it checked out/worked on. If you know me, you know my luck with cars. It sucks.

Get the call from the shop saying, "Hey, yea, you need a Front Right Wheel bearing, both rear ball joints, Alingement and balance, and you wanted the oil changed and an inspection sticker. Along with Labor that will be a grand total of $849.06."

*engage jawdropping action here* "Ok, order the parts and I'll take care of the money." Which I did and now I have a third loan, my car loan being one as well as my student loan. *sigh* Oh well. I just want my car to be road worthy. That is the important thing. Oh and I still need the heater worked on. I can buddle up in the winter.

Holy Crap!

Really?! Next Friday is my B-day.... I didn't even realize that. Like seriously I didn't even realize it. Wow. Oh well. Just another day. ^_^

*Waves*


So, I've been talking to this guy... Well, I've known him for a year. But just recently we started to really talk to each other. Seems we have the same feelings for each other. No, not mentioning any names just yet, he knows who he is and if I've told you about him then there you go. If not, don't ask.

We are holding off of a bit until we are sure. *keeps fingers crossed* Anyway, I'm off.

Why


Is there Ice one my car? In April? IN SOUTHERN LOUISIANA?!

The Mare is ...

Alive!

I swear she is. I just saw her bolt down the street that way *points down the street.* Golden fur, purple mane and tail, yep, that was her.

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